Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The First Mother

Daddy's home!

I heard somewhere on the news that Michelle Obama's biggest project, if her husband were to win, was to be The First Mother to her girls. I think that was back when I was still on the fence, and it made such a huge impact on me. As bad as it makes me sound, I couldn't come to terms with how Sarah Palin expected to be in such a demanding job with five kids, one of them the same age as my baby and special needs. I have many days that I can't even vacuum the rug under the dining room table! Even if she is a stronger woman than I, I couldn't shake the nagging feeling that her children would suffer. I'm one of those moms who believes it is my job, and a very important one, to raise my children. It's sometimes hard, and it's not always fun. It certainly isn't glamorous. But I feel it's something I signed on for when I decided to bring these little people into the world. Now, don't get me wrong... I had plenty of other reasons not to like Sarah Palin as time moved on. This was just my first impression. All that to say, I'm so proud to be an American today and excited to see where we will go under this new presidency.

On the topic of putting the job of motherhood first, though, I have a dilemma that I want to put out there. I have many friends who are stay at home moms. We have playdates and talk occasionally on the phone. We even try to have a coffee date once a week when most of our kids are in school. I enjoy these relationships, and they often help me through on the days that are hard or lonely. I am careful to keep them in "my" time, though. My closest friends are those who have priorities similar to mine, and it is something that usually goes unspoken. Other friends who don't know me as well are more likely to try to arrange girl time during evenings or weekends. One friend in particular just invited me to a "girl's night in" where we would hang out in her house and spend the night. It is the third one I know of that she's had.

This is my dilemma. I really like the girl. But, I don't feel like I'm in a period in my life that I could go out with the girls and not come home. I don't even like going out just with the girls except for special occasions. I know I would feel weird about it if my husband decided to go out for the night and not come home. In all my life, I can't imagine my mom doing that. Last time I was invited, I had a legitimate excuse. This time, I just had to respond that I didn't feel right doing that right now. I always feel like the truth is the way to go. I just hope I haven't alienated her or made her mad at me.

I know I am old fashioned. I love to be with my family, and I miss them when I'm not. I am excited to share that priority with the First Lady Elect. There will be time for the rest later.


Leah said...

Agree with everything you said. I think it would be kind of strange to stay overnight. And of course, it seems like Michelle Obama is a good mom. I'm happy to have a first mom in the white house.

Our Life As We Live It said...

I don't have kids yet, but agree that it really probably isn't the best thing to go to an adult sleepover with little ones....she should understand that and should have prefaced her invitation with "I completely understand if you can do x, y, z, but I just want you to know you're invited."

christensen crew said...

The Obama Family in the white house IS such an exciting notion! I share your thoughts on "The First Mother" goal that Michelle has. ALSO, I share your exact same opinion on the Girl's Night Out Sleepover. I too have passed on these because I just love my husband and want to sleep next to him every night. AND, just like you, I wouldn't ever want my man to go out with the 'guys' all night long and not return to me! NO WAY. I think it sounds like fun if that is what the girls want to do, but I always say this with a smile when invited to an over nighter...."I will come and stay late, but I love my hubby and prefer to sleep over with him!"

OH AND I have seen this exact same scene in my home when Daddy comes home! I have the very same shot with our three! Your Boys are SO cute and they look like the exact same stages as mine! PRECIOUS!